nsw i don't know what to say

[black90lx]

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=120921191

[Mista Bone]

late to the party.........

[Blackpony]

Who the hell has a pee bottle?

[2Kblacksleeper]

You can find some funny stories there.

[chadomac]

stupid ass people

[2007ShelbyCobra]

wow, W I T F

[306Power]

Wow, I was bored as hell last night and was searchin around on that same forum from the link. Found one where this crazy Austrailin dude kept gettin weird bugs in his house, he would trap them and put paper hats on them lol. Yeah I was that bored.

[chadomac]

WTF paper hats

[black90lx]

Wow, I was bored as hell last night and was searchin around on that same forum from the link. Found one where this crazy Austrailin dude kept gettin weird bugs in his house, he would trap them and put paper hats on them lol. Yeah I was that bored.

lol where's that link at?

[bcoh5gt]

Wow that sounds like something Kev would make up drunk years ago... Man I miss those days.

[85_SS_302_Coupe]

If it's that much of an emergency, punch yourself in the nuts or something to get rid of the boner and do your thing. You've gotta be retarded to think you can go #2 without letting #1 out. That's impossible.

[306Power]

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=120669961

Theres the link to the bettle and hat thing, dont read all 48 pages lol just skim through it. Dude takes vids of his crazy ass "hatting" the 2 bugs. It was Austria not Australlia that I just noticed too.

[94stangergt]

i still cant stop laughing wow!

[black90lx]

Wow that sounds like something Kev would make up drunk years ago... Man I miss those days.

yea i do too. one of my favorites was the racoon.

[black90lx]

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=120669961

Theres the link to the bettle and hat thing, dont read all 48 pages lol just skim through it. Dude takes vids of his crazy ass "hatting" the 2 bugs. It was Austria not Australlia that I just noticed too.

wow thats crazy....lol

[dedpedal]

yea i do too. one of my favorites was the racoon.

Much like a certain cracker we all know, I kinda grew up a little and dont have much to ramble about these days.
BTW, the racoon story was all Vinny.

[DeckerEnt]

I found this. Worth a laugh or a hundred!!!!


By Vinny5oh

Little bastards.

I used to think they were all cute. Fuzzy little bandits waddling around doing cute little racoon things. Yeah, they're bandits alright. Garbage bandits. I can't count how many times I've gone out the front door to find my garbage spread all over the driveway and in the yard.

They are pretty smart for being the little bastards they are. They figured out how to get the lid off the garbage can. They use the cinder blocks next to the cans as a stairway to the buffet. I watched them tonight. Here I am on another sleepless evening surfing the boards, cathing up on things and just as I'm headed to bed, I hear them. That distinctive Rubbermaid ruckus.

"Hey Chico, I got the lid off."
"Oh yeah? What's the catch of the day?"
"Looks like empty cat food cans, some hamburger helper and diet coke."
"Well hook a coon up brother!"
"Here, try some of this. Not sure what it is. You'll have to gnaw all the paper off."
"Aw man, moldy bread again?"
"Well then you climb your furry ass up here and have a look!"
"As soon as Guido gets outta there I will....Hurry up Guido!"
"Give me a minute, looks like I found a tuna can with some traces left in it."

Meanwhile, Ricardo is bumbling around sniffing thru the already dispensed napkins and assorted garbage in the driveway.

"SHHH! You hear that?"
"What's that guy doing with an aluminum bat?"
"And what's he doing on the porch in his boxer shorts?"
"RUN!"
"Guido, get outta the can NOW!"

As he attempts to climb out of the can WHACK! It's like that carnival game whack-a-mole. He escapes unscathed and scuttles over to regroup with his compadres.

"Damn man, that was close.....you alright?"
"Yeah. I'm okay. I might have to head over to the neighbors and see if they have any Advil in their can."
"Hey you guys, I'm still hungry."
"Are you actually going to go back?"
"I think it's safe. I don't see that crazy asshole."
"I dunno Ricardo, that door is cracked open."
"But I think I smelled bacon. I'll just go grab it and be right back"

He cautiously makes his way to the 33 gallon green sanctum of grub. After a short pause and a careful survey of the surroundings he climbs the cinder blocks and tumbles over the edge of the can to finish his pilfering.

"Where's that damn bacon? I know I smell it."
The door slowly creeks but the bandit is busy with his mission.
"Oh shit....there he is. He's looking right at me. Jesus that bat is huge"
"If I just sit here real still he can't see me."
"OW! Quit poking me buddy!"
"Fuck this! I'm outta here.....damn these slick walls, I can't get a grip!"
DONK!
"AW DAMN! Shit that hurt!"

He hurries back to once again regroup with his companions.

"Did you get the bacon?"
"No, but I got a knot on the head"
"Damn Ricardo...I tried to warn you"
"I know but I think I smelled some cheese while I was in there."
"CHEESE! DID YOU SAY CHEESE!"
"Oh no Chico......don't do it man."
"Come on, you know I have a weakness for cheese!"
"You're crazy man, crazier than that old bastard in his underwear with the bat."
"I gotta have it. I'm going in. That Sammy-Sosa-wanna-be ain't got nuttin"
"But, but.....wait.......don't......."

It was too late. Chico's all-consuming passion with cheese had blurred his thinking. There was no earthly item that could compare to the taste of semi-rotted cheese and he knew it was worth taking the risk. At least he believed that for a moment.

"I hope it was American cheese. That Swiss sure gives me the shits."
"That was awfully nice of him to leave these cinder blocks right next to the buffet bin"
"Cheese, cheese, cheese.........where's the cheese."
"Uh-oh. Here he comes again.......gotta get out.........umph, ugh...damn it"
DONK!
"Fuckin Aye!"
"Sheezuz, forget that. I'll just sit in here until he goes away."
"What the hell is that? That sure is a little bat compared to the other one"
"B"
"R"
"A"
"K"
"E"
"Brake Cleaner?"
"Hmm, sure is awfully late to be out cleaning brakes, pal"
"HEY! QUIT POKING ME DAMMIT!"
"Listen buddy you better......."
PSSSSSSST
"Aw fuck! I'm blind! AAAGHHH! It burns! It burns!"
"Stupid cheese"
"I gotta get out of here"
Donk!
"OWWW!"
"Damn you!"
PSSSSST
"AAAGHHH! It burns and stinks! DAMMIT!"
PSSSST
"YOU FUCKER!"
PSSSST

At that point he mad a mad dash out of the can and into the cover of darkness. I almost felt bad for doing it until I thought about how I'll be out there tomorrow once again picking up garbage. I gave the shredded remains of any garbage left in the can a good soaking of brake cleaner thinking that if they decided to come back later, one whiff of that tainted mess and they would recall that crazy bastard in his boxers with the aluminum bat. It's my own little Pavlov experiment.

At least they walked away............this time.

[bcoh5gt]

yes that was great

[INSANEBA]

Wow, that could've been a scene in a movie for sure! Maybe the roids have affected his train of thought lmao! As for the racoon story, thats a great way to think on a shitty ordeal! Great post for sure...

[NickBeam]

LOL I just cried laughing.

[djom1cincy]

That reminds me of the movie The Great Outdoors. That was a funny ass movie.