17 yr old step son rolled his car

[lonestang90]

I'm gonna try to make a long story short...here goes (keep in mind he is 17)

I met my wife in 2001, she had 2 boys, one 9 and one 18 months old. I have raised both these boys like they were my own untill about a year or so ago when the oldest didnt like the rules my wife and I made for him so he went to go live with his real dad. Now mind you in his entire life of fifteen years at the time this took place, he had only seen his dad like 3 or 4 times. It damn near killed my wife when he left cause he had been with her since birth. So he went to his dads to live and for the last year or so has started driving, drinking, smoking, dipping, stealing shit from people, and just pretty much has had no rules. The drinking has really gotten out of hand, and we tried talking to him about it. I told him if he kept living his life like this, 1 of three things would happen to him.

#1...wind up dead somewhere.
#2...wind up in prison.
#3...wind up in a really bad car wreck from all the drinkin and drivin..


So we got a call yesterday morning from his grandmother that after a fun filled night of him drinking with his buddy's he stayed up all night and left early in the morning to go home. 3 miles from his house he rolled his car 4 times after being airborn for 85 feet. THANK GOD he is ok, just a broke ankle and some cuts and a court date. Now he has been charged with OVI, failure to control, littering cause he tried getting rid of all the beer bottles in his car after the wreck by throwing them all over this guys yard, and possession. He was a good kid when we had him but now with no rules in place this is the out come. It just pisses me off cause I feel like all the time I took to raise him was wasted. Every value I put in him has been destroyed. The first thing he said when we got to the hospital was..wheres my cell phone and i cant believe they cut my socks off me these things are $15.00 a pair. I'll keep you all updated with what happens in court.He doesnt realize how lucky he is to be alive. Here are some pics of the car..

http://img117.imageshack.us/img117/8538/0729091046a.jpg

http://img391.imageshack.us/img391/3802/0729091053.jpg

http://img74.imageshack.us/img74/3644/0729091110.jpg

[k062693w]

HOLY SHIT !!! I'm glad he's OK !!!

[boostanggt]

Glad to hear he is ok. Everyone knows those kids from high school that think it will never happen to them and then it does. I hope this is a reality check..

[facemelter71]

Happened to me.

I wasnt drunk though.I fell asleep at the wheel in my 84 F-150 and rolled it on Ronald Reagon westbound just past the Mt.Healthy exit before the bridge.60 MPH into a series of rollover's.I woke up before I hit the gaurderail.
Its a life changing expierence.Not a cool one.Luckily I wasnt hurt,I had two huge bruises on my fore arms from smackin the steering wheel.
But I did change what I was doing and how I acted.Its terrible to have your dad have tone's drop at the Fire department and rollin in on the scene seeing his sons truck on its top.
Maybe your stepson will se this as a changine point.

[DeckerEnt]

Glad he is ok for the most part. Hope he learns something from this and changes. He should come back home. At this point in his life, he needs you!!!! And your foot on his ass showing him the rules of life. Good luck.

[YTryCobra]

Damn sorry to hear that. Glad to hear he's ok.

[PONYGRL]

Jeez he should be lucky to be alive....hopefully this will open his eyes about a few things.

[mustangboy]

Glad he is ok. I just hope you guys just don't run out and buy him another car or let him use yours. I think he needs to go without for a while to realize what he had and tried to throw away.

[Mista Bone]

When he gets to feeling better, kick his ass!!!!!

Or a simple, "I told you so, now while you listen? If not lets make you out a will so we know where to bury you."

HOPEFULLY he comes to his senses befores he really hurts himself or others.

Yeah, I had a DUI when I was 19, December 1st 1986, wrecked my EXP with 10k miles on it, blew a .024 BAL.

[Black Horse]

I'm glad he is OK.....we'll pray this will be a changing point in his life!

[lonestang90]

Thank you guys for the response. We will not be buying his way out of this. He will have to stand up for what he did. I'm like you guys, I hope he learns from what happend. Next time he wont be so lucky. When he lived with us he played football at his school, made he honor roll, and was loved by all. Now he dont live here and this is what happens. I'll keep you all posted. Thank you again.

[bascom123]

Glad he is fine, maybe this will be the wake up call he needs. Be there for him but stand strong.

[Pitbull1052]

doesnt sound as if he learned anything though......... hope everything works out

[bestracing]

Sorry to hear of the hardship he's putting you through and thankful that he's okay.


The first thing he said when we got to the hospital was..wheres my cell phone and i cant believe they cut my socks off me these things are $15.00 a pair. I'll keep you all updated with what happens in court.He doesnt realize how lucky he is to be alive.




doesnt sound as if he learned anything though......... hope everything works out
After reading his reaction at the hospital I was thinking the same thing. Hopefully we are both wrong

[MrsAPE]

Wow. Parents worst fear. Or close to the worst. Glad he's ok. I hope he learns from it too. Damn hard to be the responsible parent, especially when the other isn't. Stay strong and say ton's of prayers. About all you can do.

[Pitbull1052]

I hope so too BEST but from my experience and I do have a personal experience, my brother whom I just tried to work things out with again and it bit me in the but and earned him an a$$ whoopn and sent him packn. He use to be that straight A student, played football, basketball etc. then I went off to the Army and he went straight criminal. he was 11 when that happened and is 29 now and it hasnt stopped yet.... I do hope I'm wrong but that statment about how he acted in the hospital no remorse no nothing says a lot... but that's my .02

[Blackpony]

Glad to hear he made it out ok

[redfirepearlgt]

I hope you can work this all out with him and get the bad side of his direction in life back in order. The car, it can be replaced. The road he's headng down with the drinking and stealing, well that's a road he may not come back if you don't get him now while you have his attention. I just lost an old friend from high school this week. He suffered an alcohol siezure while trying to dry out in Louisville, KY. He was a millionaire bythe time he was 30. Problem was he could never stop drinking. Started when he was about 14. He was 41 and left a wife and twin 12 year old sons behind. Interestingly enough Brent was raised by parents who let him do whatever he wanted, no questions asked. Intervene and save this boy now while you can. You are his only hope it sounds. Thank God he has a step father (YOU!!) that gives a care in the world about his life though he may not realize it at the moment. He may hate you now, but he'll be able to love you 10,20,30 or 50 years from now.

Good luck and as others, I will be praying for your boy, but especially for you and your wife to have the wisdom to reach this young man while you still can.

We all make mistakes. But we all have to pay sooner or later. Here's my first big one when I was that age.

I was almost 17 when I rolled my dad's 1980 AMC Spirit back in 1980. It was his new work car. I think it had about 15K on it. Trying to hotdog drive on icey roads the week after Christmas while still on Christams break. I can still see the whole accident like it was yesterday, the skid, the dash going vertical then upside down, oh and the 1/2" drive ratchet that whacked me up side the head that was in the back seat. Totaled the car needless to say. I walked away with a bump on the bean. Cop said I would have been badly hurt had I been wearing my seatbelt. HMM. I wasn't drunk or on drugs, just a young "no-it-all, won't happen to me, I'm bigger than life, I have it under control, I know what I'm doing", teenager.

[Mista Bone]

All you can really do is call him, explain nicely that the road he is headed in is a DEAD end.

"Call me ANYTIME if you need to talk or a ride home."

Suggest that if he finishes school, to think about the military.

We all were the "know it alls" back then, thankfully my son is too busy working to get into any trouble. Only trouble he could get into is getting his finance pregnant, which to me wouldn't be a bad thing. I want a grandbaby to spoil rotten :)

[e5shea]

Lucky to be alive. Hopefully he remembers the values you and wife raised him with and he snaps out of it or has a coming of age moment.

[Pops Fun]

Good Luck.. thoughts and prayers

[lonestang90]

thanks people.

[Yknot]

You know I'm just glad he didn't KILL or HURT someone else...It's one thing to act like an ass and hurt yourself, but don't evolve others in it. I'm sorry for all the pain this has caused both you your wife and family, BUT I would not get to faithful that this will all work out Ok and things will now be as they were. He is still the same person, with the same problems and may very well go back to that same way of life with his no good dad. Don't fret the love and guidance you showed while he was with you, that is all one can do is to offer their love and understanding, hoping they will take it all in and love you back. The kid sounds like he has some serious resentments going, and it has nothing to do with you, it all aimed at things that happened before you arrived. You're in that impossible position of damned if you do and damned if you don't, I would just hold tight to the values that you have and if he doesn't respect them then he don't belong in your household. People have to make their own way, good or bad. Probably the hardest part is having to set back and watch someone destruct right before your eyes. How is the youngest one going? Please don't get so caught up in this bad egg that you neglect the others needs, he is not his brother, and needs lots of support.