Economic Stimulus Q&A's

[Black Horse]

This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is a very exciting new program I will explain using the Q and A format:



Q: What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A: It is money the Federal Government will send to taxpayers.



Q: Where will the Government get this money?
A: From taxpayers.



Q: So the Government is giving me back my own money?
A: Well, yes, but only a smidgen.



Q: What is the purpose of this payment?
A: The plan is you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.



Q: But won’t that stimulate the economy of China?
A: Shut up.



Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

· If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.

· If you spend it on gasoline, it will go to the Arabs.

· If you purchase a computer, it will go to India.

· If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).

· If you buy a car, it will go to Japan.

· If you purchase useless crap, it will go to Taiwan.

And none of it will help the American economy.



We need to keep that money here in America.

You can keep the money in America by:

· Spending it at yard sales,

· Going to a baseball game,

· Spending it on prostitutes,

· Spending it on beer (domestic ONLY; but not Bud, it’s German now), and

· Getting a few tattoos,

Since those are the only businesses still owned and operated in the USA

[dedpedal]

Pretty much sums it up.