Idiot Sightings

[Black Horse]

We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears
repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did
not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I
thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one
Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his
head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I
responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO,
it's not.' Four is larger than two..' We
haven't used Sears repair since.
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My daughter and I went through the McDonald's
take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total
was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said,
'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I
know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill
back.' She sighed and went to get the manager who asked
me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the
quarter, and said 'We're sorry but they could not do
that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me
back$1 and 75 cents in change. Do not confuse the clerks at
McD's.

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I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new
neighbor call the local township administrative office to
request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.
The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out
here! I don't think this is a good place for them to
be crossing anymore.'
From Kingman , KS

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IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal
lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had
iceburg lettuce.
From Kansas City
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I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an
airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in
your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I
replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I
know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's
why we ask.'
Happened in Birmingham , Ala
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The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to
cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually
challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the
buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people
when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What
on earth are blind people doing driving?!'
She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS
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At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She
was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our
manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should
do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We
all just looked at each other with that
deer-in-the-headlights stare.
This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
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I work with an individual who plugged her power strip
back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't
understand why her system would not turn on.
A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less
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When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership
to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in
it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic
working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I
watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the
door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its
open!' His reply, 'I know. I already got that
side.'
This was at the Chrysler dealership in Canton ,
Mississippi
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STAY ALERT!
They walk among us...
And the scary part is that they VOTE and they REPRODUCE !

[smoker]

this is local and i was pissed and wanted to punch the kid.

my wife and i went to the new cinema inflorence to check out the de lux viewing they had and it was sunday during the storms. they shut the theater down before our movie started and made us all huddle in a hallway until the storm passed. so when it passed i thought id call the house and check on the kids and i had left my cell phone at the house. i ask the kid working the entrance to the de lux area if they had a pay phone, he said they didnt, so iasked if there was a phone i could use as i had left my cell at home, he told me i could reenter with my ticket if i wanted to go get it. so i said, my house is like 20 minutes away do you guys have a phone i can use? he said they didnt have any phones......so i said, if you had to make a phone call what phone would you use....naturally he said "my cell phone"......so once again, i asked, if your cell phone was dead and you had to make a call and your here at work what would you do? he said he didnt know because they dont have any phones. so rather than hit him i walked over to the concession area and lo and behold.....PHONES!!!!!